Do you think you could do it? Could you write realistically about yourself? I know I couldn't. It would be impossible to even describe how I look. It's all very blurry to me. I don't really know how I look, or how I act, or what I sound like. I think I look weird, act weird and sound weird, but I'm not sure.
At the moment this blog is hidden. I'm the only person who can see it. I love it. When I said I would start a new blog, people (= a person) asked me whether this one would contain James Dean gifs like my old blogs. Well, here's a James Dean gif
(James Dean is the one with the shorter hair.)
For a few years I was very intensely obsessed with James Dean. I really wanted to be James Dean. I hoped I could somehow absorb all the things I was still lacking and really become James Dean.
Oddly, I didn't become James Dean. I'm still me, and that's a completely different thing. I'm good at imitating the little stuff he did with his face and body, though. I'm generally good at becoming obsessed with someone and then doing the little stuff they do with their face and body. This skill is mostly useless.
Why was James Dean so important to me for so long? No idea.
Why haven't I been thinking about James Dean for months now, at all? No idea.
I'm starting to think that maybe the intensity with which I feel everything is something that people normally get to experience only when they fall in love. I feel really sorry for myself and for people who are not me.
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